January 3, 2019•154 words
"Look, Terry-- we all know that The Commitment says the Pilgrim named the celestial bodies after years of studying the ten sacred potentials, right?
What this script is positing, Terry -- are you with me here? This script posits that the Pilgrim named our planets the night before Ascension after drinking five beers and smoking a joint alone in his empty apartment."
"He what? He waited til the last day?"
"He forgot to do it. Can you believe that shit, Terry!"
"And then what, he goes on drunk adventures? To come up with names for the star and planets and moons? Hours before he'd leave for an eighteen-hundred year trip?"
"Adventures! Mayhem! Comedy! There's a buddy! And a CGI prehistoric goose!"
"Sounds brilliant, Terry! And we're gonna get Cunkle Bunkler to direct the shit out of it."
Terry spits out coffee "Cunkler Bunkle!"
"It's gonna be a hit, Terry."